Whenever there is trouble, I am Writer Girl!

But during the day, my Clark Kent identity is that of a mild-mannered web designer/marketer at Vansant Creations. And while I will never forgive myself for quitting writing for thirteen years just so I could do things like eat and have a roof over my head, being a professional nerd does give me some insight into the more nerdy aspects of blogging, which I shall share with you, because if you’ve made it this far, there is a pretty good chance you’re a blogger.

1. Decide why you are you blogging.

Nothing gets done really well if you don’t know why you’re doing it.  You need to decide WHY you are blogging before you can make intelligent decisions about things like how to best setup your blog, SEO, or how to be found by your target audience.  Deciding why you blog doesn’t require any nerdy, zen-like advice, but I wanted to start here so you can apply all the following suggestions in some sort of useful way, and not willy-nilly like a wild Comanche.

Some reasons you might be blogging:

• You like to write, and you really don’t care if anyone reads your stuff.  (You’re totally lying to yourself about that second part, but “I like to write” IS a good reason to write.)
• You want to become a famous blogger/writer. (OK, now you’re starting to be honest. See? Doesn’t that feel good?)
• You want to become a RICH and famous blogger/writer. (note: there is a BIG difference between this and the last option. Hint: it’s the word “rich.”)
• You want to share your thoughts with a community of like-minded people.
• You’re a mommy, and they made you start a Mommy Blog before they let you leave the hospital with your baby.

Take a moment to ponder your reasons for blogging. If you want followers other than your family, your friends and the uncomfortably sincere girl who started talking to you in the checkout line last week, you might want to employ some of the following nerd-approved blogging ideas.

2. Research your blogging platform.

I’m not going to go into details about what blogging platform is best, because that is a whole article unto itself. There are quite few to choose from, including WordPress, Blogger, Tumblr, TypePad, blah blah blah. The main thing you need to keep in mind is that any “free” service you use is going to limit your ability to control it. So, if you have grand plans for your blog, find a nerdy friend and self-host WordPress or some other open-source program that lets you hack away at as needed. This gives you THE POWER to do anything you want (improve search engine optimization, add new ways for people to follow you, change themes, add shopping carts, etc.).

I understand self hosting requires a little money and the ability to edit the more mysterious parts of the system. Cheap hosting is fairly available; installing and tweaking can cost anywhere from almost nothing to a lot, depending on your needs and the conscience of the person you hire. I understand if you want to go with a free option. I’m just saying, there will be limitations. And transferring two years of postings to a new system once you decide you need more flexibility might be difficult.

3. Use a real domain name.

Get a real domain name. You can do this for almost nothing per year, and “myblog.com” is a lot easier for people to remember than “myblog.blogger.com” If you blog about a particular topic, say “goat cheese,” for example, try and get those keywords in your domain, like “GoatCheeseKing.com.” Google and other search engines LOVE seeing keywords in a domain and will pay more attention to you and possibly ask you to the prom.

Why did you call your blog “Kid-FreeLiving.com” when you don’t really write about not having kids?

Well, because “AmysCollectionofStuffSheWroteOnaLotofDifferentTopics.com” was taken. That’s why.  Thanks for bringing up that old wound. You’ve got a real mean streak.

4. Make it really easy to subscribe to your blog.

I read a LOT of other bloggers.  Some because they’re helpful, some because they amuse or amaze me, some just because they’re beautiful people. But that’s good, right?  I am who you want reading your blog; someone who will come back week after week. Sadly, I can’t tell you how often I go to someone’s blog, enjoy it, and then can’t find a way to subscribe to it. Sure, there may be an RSS feed link, but I don’t use RSS. Does that make me lame? Maybe. Maybe I’m rubber and you’re glue and whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you. But does that mean you want to alienate everyone who doesn’t aggregate their content through RSS?

Email works best for me. I’m psychotic about NOT having email in my inbox. So if your “new post” notification shows up in my email, I’m going to read it, if for no other reason than reading it means I can delete it from my inbox. I know that about me, so I sign up for email notification at every blog I like.

Everyone has a different preference. Some people want email, some want Google Reader, Twitter, Facebook, Google+, RSS… Make them ALL available. Every person who visits your site has their preference, or at least a first and second place preference. Don’t make life difficult for any of them.

To combat my inability to subscribe to sites I like, I’ve gotten a FeedMyInbox account. This service allows me to add 5 URLs to email for free, but after that, I have to pay. Right now I’m still in the $5 per month for 25 URLs range, but wow, I wish I didn’t have to pay to read your blog. Or if I do have to pay, I’d rather pay YOU, not a service. After all, you’re the one doing the work.

Can you find Twitter Love using social tools like Twiends? Sure. Just like you can find love with a foreign hooker. She’s there, she wants you, you put some money and effort into her, and then she’s gone. In between, you couldn’t understand a word she said and now you feel like you need a shower.  But it was just so temptingly easy…

It’s official: I’ve become the people I once mocked.  I wouldn’t even join a sorority in college because I thought it was just “Rent-a-Friend.” At the time, I actually had some shirts made for myself and some like-minded girls in my dorm, by the same company who made the REAL Greek letter pride tees. Sigma-Lambda-Upsilon-Tao. SLUT. We wore them to mock the girls going through rush, who, it turns out, can give a dirty look like nobody’s business. Rush apparently makes you pretty cranky.

Flash forward an uncomfortably large number of years later, and I find myself staring at the number next to “Followers” on my Twitter account with the same crazed eyes I once witnessed on future Tri-Delts. My cheek twitches.

I break.

I’ll admit it: I was behind the curve when it came to Twitter. I’d been enjoying my life on Facebook (late to the party there, as well), where if I wanted to use more than 140 characters to express a thought, I have the nerd-given right to do so.  Then I started Kid-Free Living, and thought maybe I should have a Twitter account just in case. I signed-up, but other than posting links to my articles, didn’t pay any attention to it for several months.

Then one day, a strange little worry-squirrel starting gnawing at my nutty-flavored soul. Could NOT being an active member of the Twitterverse be a sign of aging? Was I out of touch? Getting old?

I checked my account and was surprised to find 60 something followers.  Not bad, I thought.  Until I started looking at other people’s accounts. People who literally posted “What up ya’ll?” fifty times a day had 200, 4000, 10000 followers. What the…? Could it be that easy to get 1000+ followers?

For a week and a half I put EFFORT into it. I tweeted. I followed people I found amusing. I researched. I started to really enjoy it. That’s where they got me. When I saw Twitter’s value, I wanted to be better at it. At the end of that week I had 77 followers.  Actually, every night I had 79 followers, every morning I woke up to 77.  At that rate I would have 1000 followers somewhere around… never.

I belong to a little cooking club here (read: wine drinking club). Our theme this month was Greek, and it was my turn to do dessert. Obviously, baklava immediately threw open the saloon doors in my mind and announce it was ready for action. But, dang it, I hate doing the obvious thing. So, I thought, “What else makes me think of Greek cooking?”

Feta cheese.

Viola! Feta cheese… oh wait, I’m dessert… Hm. That is a curve ball.

Feta Cheese Ice Cream! (with orange/lemon/mint sauce)

Sure why not. I mean other than the fact that my mother and sister-in-law both threw up in their mouths when told them about the idea.

Turns out feta ice cream is amazing. Of course, I could probably mix tile grout with heavy cream, egg yolks and sugar and it would end up tasting fantastic.