Funny T-Shirts, Sweatpants, and Thou*
Did you know Mike and I own a t-shirt press and two huge embroidery machines? Weird, right? It’s like a sweatshop around here, except instead of seven year-old nimble-fingered kids, we have Mike. And it isn’t just a weird embroidery fetish. We actually have three web stores DoodleSport Dog Gifts and Babies And Childrens Gifts (the irony!) and Tee Shirt T-Shirt for custom orders.
(Hey early holiday buyers: You can get 10% off anything at any of our stores by using the discount code “kidfree” at checkout, because I love my Kid-Free readers best. I mean after my family and dog and vodka and whatnot.)
Anyway, this is why we can also have a Kid-Free Living Funny T-Shirts Store (which I started a long time ago, but then forgot to actually add inventory). I’m finally getting around to adding funny t-shirts and will try to add one or two new funny t-shirts a week. Maybe I’ll call it “Funny T-Shirts Tuesday” or something equally stupid. We heat-press designs on regular tees or “Boobage Tees” – tees cut for women so there is better boobage and tinier waists.
Opportunities for Your Own Funny T-shirts
1. If you’d like something silly embroidered on a personal tee or polo or whatever, let me know and I can do that special for you, like the name of your blog, or your nickname or a fun phrase like I just read at Point Counter-Point Point blog: “Squirrel Fury.” Great for office jokes, spouse pranks, etc. You can see the things we can stitch on at Tee Shirt T-Shirt, but I’ll get you special pricing.
2. If you have something from your blog you’d like turned into a funny t-shirt to sell, let me know and we can work on that with you and put your funny t-shirts on the store for a better percentage than you’d make at Cafe Press. I always wanted this to be a blogger resource.
Latest Funny T-Shirts
Here are the funny t-shirts I’ve added recently, you can click on any of them to be magically transported to the funny t-shirts store.
Oh, and everything is 10% off, too.
I don’t know where were-hamster came from. I just had to make it. It cracked me up.
It’s been brought to my attention that most of my “hamsters” are actually “gerbils” but these were the royalty free rodents I could find and I still think it’s cute.
* Sorry I used the phrase “funny t-shirts” so many times, I think it is obnoxious, but Google likes that sort of thing. Funny t-shirts.

















I would go broke if I sent you all my ideas for T-shirts. Ironically, I should probably order your “going for broke” T-shirt to commemorate that event…
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That’s why it took me so long to start adding tees – every day Mike and I would laugh our asses off with what we thought were great ideas, and the next day we’re like “What was it that we thought of that was so funny? I forget…” or, worse, “Wow. That was stupid. What were we thinking….”
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So is it a person that turns into a scary hamster or a hamster that turns into a tiny wolf?
Someday I want to put Tom’s designs on t-shirts. Does Mike work in sweat shop-like conditions? Does he get bathroom breaks?
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It’s a hamster that turns into a wolf-hamster. I think. I like it better as a person that turns into a were-hamster though.
Mike’s torture is that he is NOT allowed to drink while he works and we have a BAR in the same room.
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“Aaaarrgh, I’m changing! Run! Run! You might step on me and hurt me after I turn. RUUUUUNN!”
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Love this website! I wonder if you would be interested in the t-shirt I’ve always wanted to make: a bubble gum pink women’s tee–preferably scoop neck and fitted–with the phrase CHILD-FREE printed in the same sweet/loopy 70s and 80s type once used for the phrase SUGAR-FREE on bubble gum and soda. The same thing would work in black/normal collar for men or anybody who hates pink.
Also love your “horde of hamsters.” Yet another sorely needed new collective noun designation.
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I love that idea! And I’ll make it (and send you one)
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Thanks Amy, I’m looking forward to it! And then I’ll wear it all over the place and put a picture of it on my website and hopefully everyone will want one, including Bill Maher, my favorite child-free comedian. I will buy him one and mail it to him just to make sure, mind you.
Another shirt idea combines trekkies with kid-free living: “Exactly what don’t you get about the Mark of Gideon Episode?!”
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being a t-shirt whore, I like all of these.
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in screen printing, how does that work for those of us with absolutely horrifyingly large boobs (without words/pics stretched into unintelligible nothingness)?
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Unisex tee. I’m afraid the girl tees would be obscene.
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Vampire Gerbil. Nice
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